Flexibility in volition

What you ‘want’ may not be what you ‘need’, so choose your New Year’s resolutions wisely.

Move over bad habits; new year’s resolutions are here. It is that time of the year when your 2023 version tries to surface, and you desire to ditch all things deemed harmful to make way for all things socially accepted as positive in the garb of the new year’s resolutions.

What are New Year’s resolutions?

Think of them as goals or commitments people make at the start of the new year to improve their lives, and promise themselves to focus on self-growth, improvement, changing habits, and enriching lives.

How did New Year’s resolutions begin?

New Year’s resolutions have been around for a while now. The tradition dates back to ancient civilizations when people made promises to their gods at the start of the new year to earn their favours. In the Babylonian times, people even made promises to return borrowed objects and pay their debts, while the Romans called their resolutions ‘vows of the new year’. These vows were made to Janus, the god of good deeds.

In the more recent centuries, the concept of New Year’s resolutions began around reflecting and focusing on self-improvement.

Which are the most popular New Year’s resolutions?

As guessed, the top new year’s resolutions are around health and lifestyle. On the top of the list of solutions are losing weight, eating a healthier diet, exercising, and quitting vices like smoking and drinking. Many chose to work on meditation, reducing stress, saving money, learning new skills and working on giving back to the world.

The fresh start effect

Why do we wait till the end of the year or an upcoming Monday to start on a better lifestyle? This is a psychological phenomenon called the ‘fresh start effect’. People view the start of a new time as an opportunity to start afresh, based on the idea that there may be more motivation associated with a newness. The fundamental problem with this concept is that it can lead to procrastination before the actual date if we keep waiting for the perfect beginnings of the new year. Many even falter in the first few days and then ditch their resolutions altogether, citing that they will try the following year again. The most important thing to remember is that we can begin working on our goals at any time.

Rules are meant to be broken

If you are someone who makes new year’s resolutions and ends up breaking them, then you are not alone. A 2021 study found that about two-thirds of people abandon their New Year’s resolutions within a month.

The common reasons that are attributed to not upholding resolutions are:

* Setting unrealistic goals;

* Failing to track them;

* Lack of motivation;

* Lack of accountability;

* Aiming for Perfection;

* Lack of planning;

* Lack of self-confidence.

Still, looking to embark upon a change this year? Here is a gentle guide

* Don’t make them: You don’t need to adhere to societal norms and pressure of having New Year’s resolutions. Do not associate guilt and shame with goals. Remember, these are just social constructs.

* Begin anywhere: You can begin a good lifestyle on any day at any given time, and don’t need only the new year to begin.

* Motivation: Are you setting your resolutions due to intrinsic or extrinsic motivation?

* Language: Instead of the term ‘resolution’, use words with less heavy connotations. Try the word ‘resolve’ or ‘vision’.

* Nudge word: You can even try a ‘nudge word’, meaning a phrase or a mantra to describe the theme of the year you desire to see in terms of your resolution. For example, you can say this year is about ‘growth’ or ‘balance’.

* Should-could: “I should do this” can be somewhat intimidating and punitive to self if not followed.

* Patience and kindness to self: Infinite patience to be flexible towards yourself and your goals. Keep the room to evolve as you go along.

* SMART goals: Specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and time-bound.

* Chunk it up: Instead of one big ambitious goal, try to break it down into a bunch of small, easily achievable goals that gradually build up into the big goal.

* Buddy system: Seek support from a friend by chasing a goal together.

* Monthly themes: Try monthly rather than just one or two overarching goals for the entire year.

* Bucket list: Create a list of the top 10 things you would like to tick off by the end of the year.

* Anti-resolutions: These are reverse resolutions focused on commitments people make to stop doing something or break a bad habit instead of starting something new. For example, Stop smoking or stop wasting time on tasks that require not more than a few minutes.

*Celebrate all wins: Big and small wins are equally important.

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