Beating delusions

My life is currently a hell because I have perhaps the world's most suspicious partner ever. My partner thinks I am having an affair with anyone and everyone. Quite frankly, any man whoever comes along and even remotely looks my way. Lately, my partner has started to cite that I am having an affair with my colleagues, my old school mates, and the last straw was when he included my cousin on the list. I am at my wit's end and cannot understand my partner. Why is he so insecure? Is this normal?

As humans, we tend to be possessive of our belongings and loved ones. A relationship that may not be going our way, leads to a myriad emotion ranging from anger, sadness, frustration and even jealousy. Jealousy is an emotional response that is evoked when a person feels insecure about losing an important relationship to a potential or imagined rival. This emotion can easily become toxic if it begins to affect the relationship to this grave a degree and starts to consume the person. At times it may not bother the person who is jealous as he/she might live in denial.

In fact, jealousy can sometimes become pathological and is termed delusional jealousy or popularly as the Othello syndrome. The name is derived from the famous tragedy written by William Shakespeare where the lead character Othello, develops delusional jealousy towards his spouse Desdemona and eventually kills her while suspecting her of infidelity. On realising that his partner was pure as a dove, he kills himself.

When a person develops delusions which are strong, firm, fixed, false beliefs despite the contrary evidence, they refuse to accept the possibility of anything else. They get possessed with the idea that their truth (delusion) is a reality. This is a common reason for couples and marital therapy.

What to do: Approach your partner healthily and neutrally for the couples therapy. Couples and marital therapy is a form of psychotherapy where a third party

who is non-judgmental, and a trained mental health expert can carefully evaluate the situation and help both of you work on the relationship at an individual and couple level.

Movie to watch in the Indian context that depicts delusional jealousy: Omkara Send your questions to help@dreradutta.com