MillenniumPost
Opinion

The 'L' Bomb

Love, not as per societal norms, is often scorned; why should the latest Modi-Sen outcry be any different?

The L Bomb
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The night before last, my mind was a marketplace of thoughts. Busy, crowded, each thought selling its wares louder than the next, and all together a mental cacophony that refused to let me sleep. The headline of this column came to me quite spontaneously right then; like an impulsive buy that I was only too pleased to have purchased. This week two 'Ls' made the news — Lalit (Modi) and (because of him) Love.

The public announcement of his relationship with former Miss India/Universe and actor Sushmita Sen created shock, horror, outrage. The outcry was over the unlikely pairing, and there were enough unsolicited comments, memes, jokes, and judgements about the relationship. Was it a relationship of convenience? How could a former beauty queen and current charismatic actor date a person who didn't meet her physical standards of beauty? Hearts were broken left, right, and centre! From the metal-pumping, washboard abs-totting, protein drink shaking gym guy to the pot-bellied, fantasy-ridden neighbourhood uncle — the news seemed more fake than well-oiled government propaganda. How could she? The fact that her choice could really be driven by love and caring, was less frequently offered as rationale. Modi's tweet brimming with adolescent excitement, boyish affection, and unmistakable hope seemed so out of place for the man and our current world, that it was almost endearing ('almost' since he followed it up with his tiresome rants in following posts).

The news brought forward a newer trend in India. People were less aghast when Sen was dating a much younger Kashmiri model than when she, the ageless beauty, seemed to be locked in loving poses with a visibly haggard former maverick of the cricketing world. I must accept that the fact that we have gone past the gender divide in this controversy is wholeheartedly welcomed by me. As a society, we also seem to have brought parity to the beauty lens by judging men on the basis of looks as we have done women for aeons. The latter though is not a welcome development.

That we judge people and relationships based on looks is as shallow as relationships built on the foundation and surety of money. People can fall in love despite their financial status and in spite of their outer visage. It really does happen. Leonardo DiCaprio's girlfriends may seem to be sticking to an average age of 25, no matter his gaining years, but we are no one to assess what one gets from their partner.


Similarly, are we not allowed to age as we feel? Some of my friends have allowed themselves to go grey, some can't bother staying fit. Personally, I want to strive for fitness as long as I possibly can, but I can't judge others on how they wish to age as long as they stay medically healthy. Similarly, we can't judge those who get Botox, fillers, face lifts etc. to enhance their looks or clutch onto the last dregs of their youth. People should be allowed to choose their ageing process. Therefore, as a society, we can't mock people based on how they look while indirectly lauding another who takes care of themselves. (C'mon, don't tell me I'm the only one who noticed Sen's wrinkle-free yet placid facial muscles and unusually puffy lips in Aarya 2?)

Let people be. Let them age the way they want. Let them look 30 at the age of 50 or gracefully settle into their well-won wrinkles and carry them as badges of honour and experience. Let their salt and pepper hair speak of wisdom gained from victories and losses. Or let their brightly coloured tresses signal a zest for life. Let's not judge; let's not be ageist.

The writer is an author and media entrepreneur. Views expressed are personal

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