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‘Young adults are always curious about sex’

‘Young adults are always curious about sex’
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My daughter is seeing a guy from a different religion. She’s in college and refuses to end the relationship despite us asking her to. We hail from a very conservative Hindu family. We are very worried.
Mrs. Modi, New Delhi

As parents you definitely have the right concerns. But, love knows no bounds. It doesn’t differentiate between color, creed or religion. As an adult, your daughter surely has an idea about her family and background. If she is in a relationship with a guy, I’m sure she understands the consequences. You can surely speak to her and explain your expectations and concern. But, in such cases the chance of letting the relationship go is minimal. Your family should mentally prepare itself to face the ‘unwanted’.

My son is 17 years old. A few days back I saw his cellphone loaded with porn clips. We are extremely shocked as he comes across as a very decent kid! How to speak to him about this?
Neha Singh, Chandigarh

At his age, this is probably normal. Young adults are always curious about sex. As they have limited scope to explore and pornography is a vent. I request you not to worry about this and let him handle his fantasies and desire his way. Just be watchful about the company he keeps and be a good friend to him. Let him have a good journey towards manhood and treat him as an adult. Your boy is almost a man now and there’s nothing wrong about it!

In a party last week, I saw my husband kissing a woman. She is our friend’s cousin. This has shocked me. But, I don’t observe any change in his attitude towards me. What should I do?
Sarita, MP

Was he under the influence of alcohol? In parties, sometimes we land up doing some things which in a normal situations we can’t even imagine! As a wife you have all the rights to question him about his act. You should let him know what you had seen and how you felt about it. There’s nothing wrong in a constructive confrontation. As a married couple, you both have certain responsibilities and decorum that need to be maintained. Have a polite talk, this will help you clear issues.

My girlfriend insists on sex with condom. I hate it. How can I convince her to have it normally?
Name unknown

It’s but natural that your girlfriend believes in ‘safe sex’. This protects both of you. Not only from unwanted pregnancy but from dreadful diseases as well. During her ‘safe period’ you can try unsafe sex, yet, even I would advise you to use condom as prevention is always better than cure!

How safe is withdrawal sex? We practice unsafe sex but my boyfriend ejaculates outside. Please let us know.
Pinky, Chandigarh

Well, it’s not that it doesn’t work but then there are chances that it might not work some times. In today’s age you can choose from various options based on your choice. Pills, condoms are widely accepted and used. Suggest you play it safe as its good to be safe than sorry!

Have a love or life query you cannot find an answer to? Send your questions to - roopshashotm@gmail.com
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