Millennium Post

To be or not to be!

To be or not to be!
I am 28 years old housewife, taking care of my house really well. My husband is the Head in a reputed company. He just doesn’t like my mixing with his colleagues and friends, so I feel lonely and at the end of the day I feel like keeping myself in a small world of my kids and in-laws.What should I do? Please advise.
Mrs. Mehra, New Delhi

I strongly suggest you to do something on your own. Learn some skill or spend time nurturing some hobby. Your problem of passing time will be solved and you will feel independent too. This will also expand your world and you will meet more and more people, make new friends. When you have your own group your husband will also not have any problem. So go ahead, spend your life your way and don’t feel neglected or hurt. It’s not worth it!

I am a 42 year old man. My wife has left me one and half years back. Now I am very scared to get into a new relationship. Now it is just hard to trust a women. So please tell me how to come out from this terrible situation.
Jasjit, Noida

You will have to honestly evaluate the reason for which your wife left you. Then only you can make your mind stable. Blaming the women of the universe for a single person is really not justified! Now you will have to help yourself by deciding what you want in your partner. Your previous experience itself will help you a lot. For getting re-married I would advise to keep both your eyes and mind open. It may be a good idea to visit a counselor and discuss the whole thing with him or her. That would help you in rescuing from the unnecessary burden of betrayal and guilt in your head.

I am 30 years old, married for four months. Few days back, I came to know that my wife had physical relationships with couple of men before we got married. She accepted it and I was ready to forgive her. But one of my friend’s wife told me that my wife hangs around a lot with her male colleagues. She has advised me to take this matter seriously. But it is hard for me. I love my wife and don’t want to lose her. Please help.
Dinesh, New Delhi

Do not judge your wife by what has occurred in her past. In the present, you have no reason to suspect that she is being unfaithful to you. By listening to others and making your judgment, you are being very unfair to your wife. Try to protect your relationship. If you have still have any doubts about your wife, then please discuss with her. It is not about being broadminded; it is about trusting your partner and giving her the freedom to live happily. Good luck for your future.

I love to have sex with my wife but I keep remembering my ex each time we get close! I only reach the climax when I think of her. How do I come out of it?
Name unknown, Agra

You never know, she might be fantasising someone else while you are close to her! This hurts, right?? So dear, don’t do anything that you don’t want for yourself. If she’s giving her mind and body to the man she loves, you ideally should be hers. Try to watch some hot movies while making love. Divert your mind and just axe the ‘ex’, love your spouse completely. This is just not done. For you and her. Guilt is a bad trip, avoid it! 

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