I feel I’m getting addicted to technology. I feel fatigued and dead at times. Please guide.
D Kumar, New Delhi
Streamline and limit your use of technology. Experiment with short periods of inaccessibility or electronic free-time by leaving your cell phone at home for a day, each week. There may be a period of withdrawal and anxiety but life won’t end and you might even feel like you’re on holiday. Set time limits when using your technology.
Write a ‘Not-to-do list’ which would have pointers such as: Don’t check email before 10 am to avoid immediate reactive mode etc.
Go Green. Choose an outdoor activity instead of technology. Give your brain a breather and keep it from becoming overloaded by taking a 15 minute walk outside.
Find your pleasure points. Your iPhone can act as a stimulus to your brain, meaning you get a feel-good dopamine rush from checking it, which furthers your technology addiction. Retrain your brain by actively doing something else that makes you happy instead of always reaching into your pocket.
Find a buddy or accountability partner to help you with your problem. Don’t go it alone on the road to recovery, because you’re likely to revert to your old habits. Ask a colleague or spouse to help you.
I have fallen in love many times and nothing seems to work. I get hurt yet I can’t stop myself from proposing. Please advise what I should do?
If you give your heart to everyone you meet the chances are that you will get it broken almost as many times as you give it away. This can be particularly painful for someone who is in ‘love’ because they are very open and sensitive to begin with and will experience every rejection at a deep level, even if it is only after a couple of dates.
Although you may not have much choice over how many times you feel for someone, but you do have some choice over how often you express it and who you fall in love with. Choose wisely and declare after being sure of the love or the lover. Hold onto to your temptation to propose. Be sure before you dive. Good luck.
My daughter is in XIth standard. She has friends who are much older than her. Her lifestyle is annoying me but she doesn’t care. What can we do?
Baishali Kar, Kolkata
To begin with, I would want to know why you are feeling annoyed. Is it because of the fact that they are older and you fear that they may turn out to be a bad influence on her or is it just that you don’t know what kind of a friendship they have? These older friends could also be helping your daughter get through life more easily and be true shoulders to lean on.
Talk to your daughter and have a heart-to-heart chat and your problems will get sorted out. Try to bridge the gap and be a genuine friend who she can rely on.
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