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Understand your partner

Understand your partner
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I'm 26-year-old man but I feel like a woman! Please help me understand myself. Is it right or wrong?

Name unknown

You're already there... it's not right or wrong. It's YOU. You have to be yourself, love yourself the most. You have to feel - you are special! Please take this from me, a lifetime is a long time to feel confused and miserable. I know what you are feeling but don't let anyone look down upon you. Do what makes YOU happy and whatever is your sexual preference, just flow with it. There's no point leading a life that doesn't suit you! Be proud of what you are and wear your confidence well.
God bless!

My son is in 9th standard. He is always preoccupied with his computer and friends! How can we make him participate in our lives? I'm very worried!

Dilpreet Kaur, New Delhi

Adolescence is a transitional stage of physical and psychological human development that generally occurs during the period from puberty to legal adulthood (age of majority). The period of adolescence is most closely associated with the teenage years, though its physical, psychological and cultural expressions may begin earlier and end later. Your son is in this phase. A lot of new things will start and a lot of understanding and adjustment has to come from your end. He might get difficult but always remember, his strength is his family. However much aloof he might look, but you have to make that extra effort to involve him. Take him out to places he likes to visit. Spend time as a friend, interact and keep a close but distant eye on his life.

With time our physical relationship is dying completely. I need physical intimacy but my husband who is 7 years older is absolutely reluctant! I'm feeling depressed but don't know what to do. Can you kindly help?

Name unknown, Noida

Have you tried consulting a doctor? That might be required. In the mean time, try your best to ignite the flame. Keep your kids (if any) at some relatives for a night and go totally adventurous at home. Try getting close at places in your own home which haven't been explored yet. The kitchen top/ the verandah/ the roof… you know what I mean! Start the night with your sexiest self and maybe some hot movies might also be a catalyst. Also remember, too much stress at work might be the reason for the distance. Understand your partner and help him bridge the gap. All the best!

My father in law is retired and stays at home all day. He watches TV in his room and I have realised that he watches pornography at home! I have young kids and I'm tensed. What should I do?

Name withheld, Kolkata

Well, as you have written that your father in law is watching it in his 'room', there's not much you can do. In fact, I suggest, let it be. He has his right to do what he wants in his own space. Maybe, all his life, he didn't do it and now he's making up for it. As there are kids around, just ensure, the door is closed. That's it. Live and let live, my dear. Let all live in happiness.

(Send your questions to roopshashotm@gmail.com)
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