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NEVER GIVE UP!

Our personal life has been completely over since my wife got too busy with the children. I feel that I might end up betraying my wife. Would that be a crime?

Name withheld

Crime? Well, that is too strong a word and is completely based on your perception. I understand how difficult your situation is. Why don't you force her to take a holiday or a weekend break with you? If she is avoiding this, just warn her that you will go and explore the vacation offer that one of your ex girlfriend/woman colleague was indicating! Jealousy and insecurity will heal your situation and might act as a catalyst in your life. Good luck!

My boyfriend is always busy loving himself. Is he a narcissist? I'm deeply worried.

S. Sen, Kolkata

Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a long-term pattern of abnormal behaviour characterised by exaggerated feelings of self-importance, an excessive need for admiration and a lack of understanding of others' feelings. As he is your boyfriend, you are the best judge to understand if he is the kind to be affected by NPD. Does every sentence that comes out of his mouth start with 'I'? Ideally he should care about what is going on with you, not just with him. He should also care about the world around him, not just himself. It is often not easy to put up with a person who is self-obsessed. Do what you think is right for you and take every step cautiously.

Though my fiancé is earning, yet he is always broke. What do I do?

Name withheld

Being broke is not a sin but in the case where you're paying for everything, it is sometimes frustrating and burdening. There might be times when as a couple you'll are low on cash. Lavish gifts and fancy dinners might be out of the question. But, if he's supposedly dirt poor yet he expects you to pay for it all, he could be happy just being supported by you. I've seen it happen many times where a guy is very generous in the beginning; but once he's comfortable, he conveniently forgets his wallet every time the bill arrives. There's nothing wrong with treating him sometimes, but if he's unwilling to share the costs, it might get truly difficult. Converse and fix it before it gets worse.

When I was in 7th standard, I had flunked in class. I am appearing for my boards next year and my parents are extremely worried. They are constantly poking me and making me more nervous each day. What can I do?

Ravi, New Delhi

Probably, the past is the reason why they are getting extra hyper. They are concerned too. But, you need to focus on your studies and forget everything about the surroundings. Do you have earplugs/earphones? Just use them. Don't let any external pressure pull your spirit down. We all have our lows and highs and it is just a matter of a few more months for the situation to fall into place. Be patient, confident and concentrate on your exams. Don't argue, ignore peacefully.

(Send your questions to roopshashotm@gmail.com)

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