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Insight

Let go of mindless taboos

It is important to tolerate others and their opinions if you expect the same from them towards you – we all have issues, so nobody has the right to judge another

My ex-boyfriend is threatening to expose our intimate mails and digital pictures. I'm feeling horribly scared. My family will disown me. What can I do?

Name withheld

Don't you have anyone in your family or circle of friends who can help you fight this out? You perhaps would need some strong support of your family to sort this mess. Don't be scared. Blackmailing is a punishable offense and he should realise his stupidity soon.

Don't delay any further. Involve the ones you can trust and sort it soon. Family might get angry but they will always support you and will take care of you at all times. Be confident and fight this out. Don't lose heart.

Our daughter is perhaps homosexual. We belong to a very conservative joint family. I am shattered.

Name withheld

Homosexuality isn't a crime. There are too many happy, healthy and successful individuals out there who are proud of their preference. Please don't get upset about this. She has the right to choose who she is.

As a parent, your support is essential. Don't make her feel guilty or wrong. We as a society have to change the mindset and be supportive. Let us respect individuals and individuality. She needs you to understand her. Don't lose heart and accept the truth.

My girlfriend is six years older than me. Is it a big deal? We want to get married.

R. Guha, Kolkata

It is only a big deal when you allow yourself to believe so. There are many people out there that are married to mismatched age differences. Chances are you will be more compatible than you think. People are always going to be quick to judge to make themselves feel better. But in the end, this is your life and you should move about it and make decisions that will make you happy!

I don't like my husband when he is friendly with any other woman. I'm not jealous but uncomfortable. How can I change him?

Sakshi Singh, New Delhi

It isn't possible to change anyone. Too much pressure will turn him sly and he might continue his traits behind you. I suggest you to let go of the feelings that you go through and trust your partner. Don't restrict his moves but time and again exhibit your emotions. Don't be pushy but warm. Don't react always. Space and trust will make situations healthy and peaceful. Don't try to change anyone, it doesn't work.

(Send your questions to roopshashotm@gmail.com)

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