COMPREHENDING IT RIGHT

I'm having sleepless nights after I have seen a blue film. I'm in class 9 and scared that I can't concentrate on my career. Please guide.

Name withheld

Take a deep breath and learn to relax. We all have had such beginnings and trust me there are many who go through this phase. Try to concentrate on outdoor sports, read books and watch movies that add fuel to your soul. Spend time doing things that keep you happily engaged. The effect of watching something that is filmed and created cannot be stronger than your own will power. You are not a kid anymore and nothing is impossible if you make an effort. Chill and remain cool. It's just a phase and it will pass

I don't want to cheat or lie yet I think I am attracted to a colleague at work. I have a wife. What should I do?

A Banerjee, Kolkata

Cheating is a form of lying. If you're having an affair, take a good, hard look at your life and ask yourself why you're married to the person you're married to. If you love your wife but lust someone else, realize how unfair the situation is. You want the comfort of your wife, but you're not willing to be exclusive and honest with her. This is selfish behaviour. If you no longer love your wife, then why are you still married to her? Either of you would probably be much better off if you were given the opportunity to find someone you truly loved, or someone who loved you back. Think about it.

In a party last week, I saw my husband kissing a woman. This has shocked me. But, I don't observe any change in his attitude towards me. What should I do?

Name withheld

Sometimes we land up doing some things which in a normal situation, we can't even imagine! As a wife you have all the rights to question him about his act. You should let him know what you had seen and how you felt about it. There's nothing wrong in a constructive confrontation. As a married couple, both have certain responsibilities and decorum that need to be maintained. Have a polite talk and express your feelings. This will help you clear the cloud.

My wife is pregnant and she is causing a lot of problems between my mother and me. I hate returning from work. I don't know how to handle the situation at home.

D Peter, West Bengal

At present I strongly recommend you to forgive, forget and learn to accommodate more than you have ever done. You know well enough that your wife is going through a new and challenging phase of womanhood. She needs your love, care and support. Talk to your mother and express your concern. Her love and support will help you sail.

Don't get angry or neglect your home at any cost. Try never to lose your temper and stay in the situation to fix it. I'm sure things will be fine in the near future. Enjoy the journey and happy parenting.

(Send your questions to roopshashotm@gmail.com)