Millennium Post

Be your own boss

No price is too high for the privilege of owning yourself — do what you think is best for you without adhering to societal norms

I'm a lesbian and a senior IT employee. My parents are trying to arrange my marriage end of this year. I don't want to and can never love a man. How to handle this situation?

Name withheld

You know the answer, my dear. You have to convey your message to your family in the best possible way. There is no question of you being forced to marry someone you don't want. Your sexual preference is your choice. Don't try to please anyone as you are your first and only priority in matters like these. You can't marry because of any pressure. Be firm and if need be, relocate to a different city. Stay happy and everything will be perfect. Good luck!

We are in a steady relationship since last six years. She trusts me but I can't resist hot women. I need to fix this. I can't lose my girlfriend. I love her. Please guide.

Name withheld

The simplest way to 'fix' this is to stop entertaining other women in your mind. You have to have control over yourself as such things have serious negative consequences in future. To feel lighter and better, let your partner know this. May be not entirely but she should have some clue about your real self. Even if it means letting your relationship take a knock. The accountability is important and opening the communication channel on this topic will make it stronger in the long run. Otherwise, you might lose her forever.

My wife snores a lot. I can't sleep at night. Please guide what can be done?

Name withheld

Some couples choose to have separate bedrooms. It works for some people, happily. They may go to a separate bedroom to watch TV, read or get close and then go to sleep in their respective bedrooms. Space in life is never a bad idea. You could also try to train a person to sleep on their side or stomach, which may help prevent snoring. You can prop pillows in a position so the snorer is on her side or stomach and can't flip onto their back (the position which shoring is most likely to occur). You can nudge them to turn over, but if that doesn't work, it may be a sign that your partner has obstructive sleep apnoea (a problem that should be evaluated by a sleep specialist). To save your situation, for the time being, you can also try earplugs. Good luck.

Last month, I met a girl at a party. She is beautiful but is not keen on having a relationship. I think I have fallen in love with her. How to convince her?

Tanveer Ashraf, New Delhi

It is too early to jump to any conclusion. Please don't rush. Meet her and try to be a friend first. Only when you have spent quality time, you will understand if she is the one you want in your life. Her beauty is not the most important part of her being. You have to know the person and the personality before you jump. Take it slow and let the bond be steady.

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