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Millennium Post

Accepting the harsh truth

Anyone who lacks the courage to look at the truth is a coward. Cowards are really hard to love.

I don't have a girlfriend. Somehow, girls move away from me. Can you help me impress the girls?
Honey, New Delhi
These are some very important ingredients that might help you:
Be Your natural, confident self
Be suggestive and not loud in your approach
Use your eyes to speak the language of your heart
Your smile can work wonders
Care for and complement her
Be honest and transparent
Don't flirt with others in front of her
Dress smartly and aptly
Listen more; talk less
Try to be a good friend. A genuine one.
My boyfriend is a compulsive liar. I'm extremely upset. Why does he lie to me?
Name unknown
There are people who lie and then there are liars. All people, at some point or another, lie. White lies exist but we often substitute the word "excuses" for "white lies". But it's basically the same thing. On the other side, there are habitual liars. These people have made a habit out of lying. Sadly, there are some hard truths about liars. Think about it, why do people lie? They don't want to look stupid, they don't want to be wrong, they don't want to let people down, they want to keep everyone happy, they want to get what they want.
All of these motives have the "self" at the centre. Anyone who lacks the courage to look at the truth is a coward. Cowards are really hard to love. They will perpetually frustrate you. Instead of admitting their shortcomings, their failures – their basic humanness – they will lie in order to cover it up. Please understand where you stand and decide where you want to take your future with him. Too much frustration will break you. Think and act.
I have a friend who loves me immensely but he never accepts it. He never proposed but gets jealous if I hang around with other guys. What could be this relationship and its future?
Anayaa, New Delhi
Try not to be "too available". My advice would be to start seeing other people and when he calls, occasionally tell him you're busy or going out. Maybe that will snap him out of the "we're just friends" routine. The bottom line is – you need to take care of yourself. He may be jealous and possessive but unless he steps up to the plate, what do you really have? By the way, I would definitely let him make the first move. He's scared of something and he has to deal with whatever that is before he would be ready for anything deeper. Don't worry about the future. Handle the present well and all will be good! Take care.
My husband is 13 years older than me. He doesn't seem to be interested in having a child. We had an arranged marriage and he loves me a lot. What to do? I'm shattered
Name not given
You have to establish your desire and clearly state your mind. It is quite selfish on his part to be ignorant about such a vital aspect. May be you can involve the parents or any other close member of the family or friend who in turn can help him understand the need of an offspring. You can trick him into a situation of visiting a doctor, that might help. Be confident and don't compromise on this at all.
(Send your questions to roopshashotm@gmail.com)
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