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Millennium Post

Pitfalls and Pleasures

Pitfalls and  Pleasures
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Unintentionally I land up lying. I want to stop it. Please help.
Name not given

Habitual lying often begins as a means to gain attention, boost self-esteem, or to increase social standing. As a result, they burn numerous bridges, spend large amounts of time alone, and have a difficult time maintaining relationships and retaining a job. First and foremost, it is important that you find a therapist that you feel comfortable with and can be honest with.
Therapy is essential to determining the causes of your behavior as well as understanding what effect your lying has on those around you. Most therapy sessions will revolve around your behavior modification and will help you recover soon. All the best!

My wife follows a guru. Almost 10 days a month she sleeps separately and gives the excuse of her belief. We are married for 1 year and this is affecting my life badly. What to do?
Aniket, New Delhi

This is really sad! Just tell your wife that her guru and she are forcing you to look for fun outside marriage! She needs to understand you and maybe she is not realizing what she is losing by doing this! No woman would want her husband to look for pleasure outside, hence I'm she will rectify her life and focus on you and your happiness!

I don't like my husband when he is friendly with any other woman. I'm not jealous but uncomfortable. How can I change him?
Name unknown

It isn't possible to change anyone. Too much pressure will turn him sly and he might continue his traits behind you. I suggest you to let go of the feelings that you go through and trust your partner. Don't restrict his moves but time and again exhibit your emotions. Don't be pushy but warm. Don't react always. Space and trust will make situations healthy and peaceful. Don't try to change anyone, it doesn't work!

My sister's husband is having an affair with someone. They have a 4-year-old daughter. How do we convince my brother-in-law to come out of that trap?
Meghna, Noida

Convincing someone to do anything against his/her own will is impossible. Ideally, your sister or you should have an open chat with the man. Try to understand the reality and if need be, the couple should go to a professional to take help for reconstruction of their marriage.

(Send your questions to roopshashotm@gmail.com)

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