‘Maybe your son finds solace in brothels’

My ex husband is married and we are not in touch. I feel sad about the break up and miss him sometimes. I know he misses me too! What should I do?
Neetu, New Delhi

Just let go! Let go of the man who doesn’t belong to you anymore! You can always continue remaining good friends but don’t do anything drastic as he is now legally someone else’s husband. Emotions are difficult to control at times but we all have to act matured for a peaceful life. I know this will hurt but for a better tomorrow, you have to face this today!

We have found out that our only son visits brothels with his colleagues! This has completely shaken us up. How do we approach him and stop him?

Mrs. Verma, Haryana

How are you so sure about his whereabouts? Have you personally seen this? Firstly, I request you not to panic! If you are familiar with his friends, you can surely enquire in a friendly discussion and be alert. If the information is correct, as parents you’ll should try to have a heart-to-heart conversation with him. There must be a void that is leading him to do this. Understand that and in a peaceful way express your concerns. May be he will stop it the moment he realizes that his secret is out!

I have just realised that my wife is regularly keeping in touch with her ex-boyfriend. They have even met for coffee! I’m very hurt. Should I file for a divorce?

Name withheld

Why are you even thinking of divorce? Did you confront your wife? You should be a friend and ask her to talk about it. She must be having her reasons and please, don’t suspect without a valid reason. Going out for coffee is no crime but hiding it from you is unfair! Take it easy. Talk it out and I’m sure this isn’t what you are reading it as. Trust your wife and have a transparent talk. Don’t fight!

We are fixing our younger son’s marriage. This is arranged from the newspapers. We want to know the detailed info about this girl’s family from authentic sources. Could you suggest how we could go about with it?

Singhvis, New Delhi

The most authentic way would be to engage a professional agency who in lieu of a fee will provide you with all relevant information of the family, its background and other relevant details of the prospective bride. Hire the agency and get the work done. But, the couple concerned should ideally spent quality time to analyze their compatibility; as that is something nobody else can find out. Just them. All the best!

My baby girl is two months old. I’m not enjoying sex at all. I feel pain and feel very fatigued. My husband doesn’t seem to understand and insists on regular sex! How do I stop him? Help!
Kavita, Dehradun

Just pack your bags and tell him that you want to stay with your parents for a few weeks as they want to enjoy this new phase of their life. As grandparents they want to have the honour of hosting the little one! This ideally should help you regain your comfort and once you are fresh, come back and have a great time.

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