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Jealous jeopardy

Jealous jeopardy
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I feel very suspicious whenever I see my boyfriend with any girl. What should I do?
Shruti, Gurgaon 

Jealousy isn’t always a sign of weakness or insecurity. It could also be an expression of love but jealousy in a relationship isn’t always easy to handle. It’s a sign of insecurity and the fear of losing the one you love. While jealousy due to misunderstanding is acceptable, irrational jealousy isn’t. 

Learn to trust your partner and don’t doubt them unnecessarily. Let there be no secrecy and if something bothers you, tell your partner in a clear and pleasant manner that you did not like or appreciate their behavior. The problem with dealing with jealousy in a relationship is that most people forget to put themselves into their partner’s shoes and see what they would have done.

I’m feeling I’m in love with a girl I met online. She’s beautiful and says she is in love too. But she doesn’t want to meet me. We are having an affair since last three years.
Ravi Ahuja, New Delhi

Do you have a clear picture as to why she is avoiding the meeting? What’s her reason? If you claim 3 years of ‘affair’, then it is indeed high time to meet, be with each other and spend quality time to explore the togetherness.

 Every affair needs proximity and touch. Would request you to set a date in your mind and plan a meeting to discuss the future. Illusion is sometimes as strong as love itself. Handle your emotions with care and face it. If she is serious about you, she will face all odds to be with you. Good luck.

My brother is studying in Chennai.  From the last couple of months, we feel he has changed his behaviour towards us. He is rude, absent minded and scoring very low. My parents are worried. What can be done?
Vimal, Bangalore

Do not waste time. Either go and visit him or bring him home to have a very transparent communication. The behavioral pattern that he is exhibiting definitely requires immediate attention. It surely could be some unsaid stress, untold fear that he is keeping deep within. This has to come into light and solved from the root.

Be friendly, over attentive, caring and let him speak. Do not lose your cool at any cost and don’t try to control him too much. If there is any resistance, do seek professional help. Best wishes.

I can’t trust anyone. I feel everyone is selfish and here for a reason. Is this abnormal? Please guide.
Name unknown
 
At first, I request you to have confidence on yourself. If you have a positive inner self, nobody can scar it. It is indeed a fact that in present time, there seems to be a difference between the face and the mask. People do have hidden agenda which may conflict with your expectation. The best way to be a happier individual is to have less emotional involvement. 

Give every association the time it requires before you give in or open up completely. Selfish people do exist but alongside exists the good souls. Life will bring both. Wish you the luck to differentiate between the two. Don’t panic and just be yourself.

Send your questions  to roopshashotm@gmail.com
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