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If the love is true, you’ll be together

If the love is true, you’ll be together
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My brother has an ugly habit of being rude and violent with my mother. He’s 25-year-old and this problem is going from bad to worse. What can be done to control his temper and behavior?
Sumi, Agra

Erratic behavioural pattern, mood, anger sometimes require professional help. If yoga, meditation, parental counselling doesn’t do good, please seek professional help. Sooner it begins, better it will be for him. He might not be willing to meet anyone. Insist, coax, threaten and ensure that you take him to the counsellor. He needs immediate attention.

I am beginning to fall in love with a man who is married, has a teenage daughter. I know he loves me but he doesn’t want to marry me. How can I convince him to marry me?
Name unknown, New Delhi

Can you actually ‘convince’ someone to marry you? Do you think such a marriage will survive the test of time? Spontaneous and unconditional love is what makes life worth living together. I sincerely request you not to force anyone for anything as important and serious as ‘marriage’. If the love is true, togetherness will happen. Don’t go out of your way to change anything.

I had once slept with a woman in Goa. She is a foreigner and it was just a casual sex. I told my wife about the incident as I was feeling a bit guilty and since then she has stopped speaking to me! She is seeing a lawyer too! I’m really shattered. How can I fix my life again?
Mr. Dhote, Haryana

Time is the only medicine and sometimes some value adds – gifts, vacation, tears might help too. Now that the beans are spilled, the only way to turn the table is to seek whole hearted forgiveness. Write her a long letter, send her greetings card, courier flowers and keep saying- sorry.
Transparency and honesty sometimes do make us travel rough roads but if you can convince her of the undying love, the honesty you have shown by not hiding the truth, I’m sure she will be with you. Time will heal and patience is the only medicine.

I love my mother but can’t get married to her friend’s daughter. We are a conservative Hindu family and I am in love with a Christian girl in office. Should we elope? We are very worried.
D. Rao, New Delhi

Elope? Well, this is quite filmy! But, in reality – elope and go where? Is it truly possible to sever all ties and lead a life without your family? May be, you should both give the relationship some time. Speak to the families, meet them and try everything possible to make them understand. Sometimes parents act very difficult but at the end of it all, we being their children are usually accepted and loved in every situation. There will be downs and turbulence but have faith. If the love is true, the storm will pass and peace will prevail. Good luck to both of you!

Have a love or life query  you cannot find an answer to?  Send your questions to -  
roopshashotm@gmail.com
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