Falling in love again
I’m 22 persuing MBA. I seem to fall in love all the time. Is something wrong with me?
Babu Prakash, New Delhi
This isn’t a bad thing and it doesn’t mean that someone like this is desperate or needy, simply that they are more vulnerable to falling for people who don’t reciprocate their feelings or who are scared off by the strength of their emotions. They may experience the initial rush of falling in love many times but rarely get past the initial phases to develop a strong and lasting relationship.
Being someone who falls in love easily is an advantage when it comes to dating because you don’t
have to dismantle your own fears and defenses to let someone in but imagine if you could only give your gift of love once more in your life. This would mean you would be much more discerning about who received it – they would have to be someone very special, who you got to know well, to ensure that they were the right person before you ever said those three little words and gave them your heart.
Since the age of seven my mom has been beating me for no reason. She’s made me bleed many times too. I’m really scared of her. What to do?
Everything you have talked to me about would be called physical abuse. It is very wrong and should not be happening to you. You say that sometimes it is your fault and I really do want to stress to you that, no matter what you do, being hurt is never your fault. Nobody has the right to hurt you like this. You deserve to feel happy and safe where you live. The quickest way for the abuse to stop is to tell a trusted adult such as a teacher or guardian or a senior member of the family, they will then be able to support you and contact people who can keep you safe.
Do take care and be safe. You are important and there are people out there who would want to help to stop this abuse.
I got engaged recently and now my fiancé is forcing me to get physical. We are to get married at the end of this year but I’m not sure about taking this step. Can you guide?
This is completely your personal decision. If you like him, you have faith and you are comfortable, you surely can get closer. It is completely your choice and should not be controlled on what he wants or expects! May be some more time and you will be feeling complete being with him. Don’t rush into it. Two people stay a lifetime only when they respect each other’s opinion. Your partner will surely understand you and will help you overcome the inhibition. Trust your instinct and play safe! All the best.
I want to balance work and home. Can you give me some tips.
Understand the importance of drawing a line between work and home.
Make sure that you don’t use the master bedroom for your home office. The master bedroom should be off limits to computers and televisions, if possible!
Don’t use your work schedule as an excuse to opt out on doing your share of the household chores.
Try to do one thing at a time.
Turn off your landline phone, cell phone, and other electronic devices that could interrupt you from spending time with your spouse and children.
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