Do I really need a man to keep me safe?
26 May 2012 2:08 AM GMT
The city is full of drudgery and there's something that lurks in the dark. That's Delhi for me. But dreading to go out and not challenging it is unacceptable to me. So each time I challenge the obstacles, they tend to give me a new direction in life. They question me in ways I fail to understand. But either way, I have something to look ahead to. Â
When we read about the cases of molestation and rape almost everyday in the papers, it sounds distant. But that is not to say that I have not been moved by them. They make you realise that it could be anyone, including you.
This is when my feminist ideas have also been challenged many a times. I do not conform to the belief that feminism is all about shunning the male, or transgressing one's own nature to be stronger. It is simply about refusing to put a man at the centre of the universe.
It is about whether I really need a man to be able to be a woman. Can I still be a woman with all the graces without emulating a man? I do not subscribe to the popular belief that women have to be either tomboyish or meek.
If you happen to know only these two kinds of women, time to meet the third kind — a woman who celebrates being a woman in every essence of the word and also knows that in time we would love to have a family, too.
Hooking up with guys and being needy is the last thing on my mind. I rather enjoy the freedom of being single. There is nothing conservative about it, it is liberating to live in a city where women need a man for their own safety.
There are many women who either out of sheer boredom or sometimes out of loneliness indulge in meaningless affairs, complicating their lives. This is where my dilemma starts.
Can single woman in a city like Delhi remain single and safe? I decided to ask a few friends about why they are in a relationship or why they aren't. Many of them did not actually believe in love, and the hype around love. They opt for a 'little more than casual friend' merely for safety reasons. For one, I don't believe in love but I would have a boyfriend because I need to be sure I am safe, a Delhi girl told me.
'Do you have a boyfriend?' I have been plagued by this question innumerable times which compelled me to think whether I really needed one. So next time anybody asks you this, tell them I am very single and love to mingle .
When we read about the cases of molestation and rape almost everyday in the papers, it sounds distant. But that is not to say that I have not been moved by them. They make you realise that it could be anyone, including you.
This is when my feminist ideas have also been challenged many a times. I do not conform to the belief that feminism is all about shunning the male, or transgressing one's own nature to be stronger. It is simply about refusing to put a man at the centre of the universe.
It is about whether I really need a man to be able to be a woman. Can I still be a woman with all the graces without emulating a man? I do not subscribe to the popular belief that women have to be either tomboyish or meek.
If you happen to know only these two kinds of women, time to meet the third kind — a woman who celebrates being a woman in every essence of the word and also knows that in time we would love to have a family, too.
Hooking up with guys and being needy is the last thing on my mind. I rather enjoy the freedom of being single. There is nothing conservative about it, it is liberating to live in a city where women need a man for their own safety.
There are many women who either out of sheer boredom or sometimes out of loneliness indulge in meaningless affairs, complicating their lives. This is where my dilemma starts.
Can single woman in a city like Delhi remain single and safe? I decided to ask a few friends about why they are in a relationship or why they aren't. Many of them did not actually believe in love, and the hype around love. They opt for a 'little more than casual friend' merely for safety reasons. For one, I don't believe in love but I would have a boyfriend because I need to be sure I am safe, a Delhi girl told me.
'Do you have a boyfriend?' I have been plagued by this question innumerable times which compelled me to think whether I really needed one. So next time anybody asks you this, tell them I am very single and love to mingle .
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