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Dealing with depression

Dealing with depression
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I’m suffering from depression after I lost my father last year. I'm unable to cope up.
Jyoti Surana, New Delhi
I completely feel what you are going through. Losing a parent/ near one is a very difficult situation. But, life goes on and the show must go on too. I suggest, divert your mind on things that you like to do. Enroll in some hobby, explore an interest, meet friends, plan a vacation. Always remember, your father is watching you and he gets very upset seeing you unhappy! Your smile is not for you but for him. You will have to control your depression and move on with a positive approach. 
All the best!

Im a working woman married for six years. We are not planning to have children now. But our parents are really insisting! This is annoying. How to handle?
Divya Karnani, Patna
Starting a family is a very important decision and a couple should both mutually agree. This decision cannot be convinced by anybody else! Acting on pressure should be avoided. As a mother you would have the maximum responsibility towards the newborn. Please plan the baby only when you are physically, financially and emotionally prepared. Tell your family members that you'll are planning it soon... ‘Soon’ is an open ended term and let the chapter of parenthood happen naturally and peacefully!

 I was physically molested by my neighbour when I was a kid. I still can't come out of that shock. I’m 24 now and feel too cold towards men. How should I cope up?
Name withheld
I’m really sorry to hear this. Please don’t worry. If you ever share conversations with woman around you, you will find out a horrible reality. Most of us go through some kind of molestation or abuse as children but we don’t protest. Or rather we don’t even realise that this requires severe attention and punishment for the culprit. The scars remain forever. I sincerely request you to let go. It’s not easy, I know. If need be, change the city and leave the wound behind. Try to mix with men and take time to know them. Once comfortable, once in love, this will fade and you will have a fresh beginning. Don’t hold on to ugly shadows of the past...Please!

I am overweight by almost 16 kgs. I try but somehow I remain fat. I have no problems but constant taunts hurt me!
Suraj, New Delhi
For some reason, these days society treats ‘fat’ as a kind of taboo. My suggestion, as long your health is not getting affected, take it slow. Yes, being in shape is medically, physically, emotionally very satisfying but don’t do anything drastic to reduce. Consult a good dietician and get your daily intake corrected. Go for walks, join a gym with a friend and do what you think makes YOU happy. 
Being fat isn’t being unhappy and you shouldn't bother when words hit you. Just reply – I’m fat but fit, are you?

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