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Millennium Post

BROKEN TIES

BROKEN TIES
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My mother doesn't live with us. After divorce she lives in Dubai. I miss her always. I'm in class VIII. How to cope with this?
Neha, Amritsar

Life is life, and you gotta accept it to a certain extent. The wonderful thing about mother is that no matter how far away she might be, you'll always be cosmically connected. But nonetheless, bring it to both your parents' notice how much you miss your mother and long to be with her. Video chat with her and stay connected on phone as much as possible. Request her to relocate to a place close to where you stay so that frequently meeting her in person would be easier.

Our daughter wants to pursue acting. We are a family of educated professionals and my husband is dead against her decision. Whom do I support?
Radha Desai, New Delhi

Nowadays media careers are much more streamlined than they used to be, but even then, acting is somehow, not considered career by most of the parents because of the uncertainty and struggle involved. Yet, I truly believe that a person can only succeed if he follows his real passion. So as an understanding mom, take your own stand in this case and try to convince your husband in supporting your daughter, to help her go all out to achieve her dreams.

Your support will be inspiration enough for her. Even if she stumbles, both of you can be her strength. But also alert her about the flipsides too and ensure that she completes her formal education so that she has a plan B, ready for backup.

I don't want any commitment in the relationship but my girlfriend insists on marriage by next year. I'm not prepared for this. How to convince her?
Name unknown

If you don't want to marry your girlfriend, please open up and tell her clearly what is on your mind. No one benefits from a one-sided wedding. Our society considers marriage to be a pinnacle of existence for women. But that is not what the society feels in case of a man. So explain it to your girlfriend what kind of a relationship you are looking at. Reassure her that just because you are not interested to get married does not mean that you love her very any less.

I'm pregnant and my mother in law keeps insisting that she wants a boy from us. I'm very nervous. What if we have a daughter? What should I do?
Mehra, Gurgaon

Either way a boy or girl is a blessing. Gently ask your mother in law how she would have felt if her own parents had wanted a boy and treated her horribly as a result. Also keep your husband posted about the uneasiness you feel because of her behavior. And finally if she persists doing the same, try and stay away from her during the remainder of your pregnancy and get in touch with your nearest Beti Bachao committee to feel safe.

She should be wishing for a healthy baby and grateful that you are going through this to provide her with one. Perhaps a little abruptness on your part will help.

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