Relationships supersede riches

My mother is very irrational and keeps torturing my father who has a very quiet personality. I'm 14 years old and the regular fights at home have been affecting my mind.

Please help.

R. Kumar, New Delhi

You have every right to sit down with your parents with a calm and clear mind to make them understand what you are undergoing. Tell them that the family needs to be happy and all three have a role to play. Do not blame her as this may cause more problems. In a subtle way, make her understand that happiness is a choice and maintaining good relationships is a major contributor to a person's well-being.

We are getting married in January. Though we have been engaged for two years, I still don't feel like settling down. I want to study further and take up a job, but my family is not agreeing. Please advise.

Shruti Srinivasan, Noida

Make your family understand what you want. Just like men, women too have the right to live their life with sound education and financial independence. Tell them you want that. Tell them you are not ready for marriage unless you have a job. Make them understand that in that way you will be helping your better half too when you are married. All the best. Don't lose heart. Follow your dreams and never compromise on such an important decision of your life.

My husband is cheating on me and I can't do anything about it. He supports my mother financially and we are dependent on him. I feel suicidal at times.

Name withheld

Please don't lose heart and have patience. If a close friend or a family member of his speaks to him it may help. If your husband enjoys his life and doesn't care why should you care so much to feel suicidal? Is he so important? I would suggest you that you try for a job to occupy yourself. Remember your life is yours and no one has a hold on it except you. Prove yourself to be strong enough, so that no one can disturb your peace and mind come what may.

My brother is very successful and works in the UAE. His wife keeps showing off her riches to my wife. This is causing problems in my marital life. I'm a sales manager and I don't know what should be done.

Mr. Mitra, Kolkata

You need not do anything. Speak to her and tell her that happiness and harmony do not depend on riches. If we valued food, love and cheer more than hoarding gold, we would have a merrier world to live in. You can also ask your wife to get involved in some constructive work so that she understands the value of money and relationships. This is somewhere you must be firm. Your wife will surely understand soon.

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