Keys to be together

I have fallen in love with a girl after many years of loneliness. How to ensure a good relationship?

Name withheld

To ensure a good relationship, follow these simple steps:

Keep your promises: In most cases, we over commit. Do what you say you'll do. Always respect her and her people. While dating, be on time. Keep the other informed about any changes. Do not take anyone for granted.

Stop assuming: Establish good lines of communication instead. Talk and express as much as possible.

Listen to what she's saying: Don't pretend to listen – actually listen. Sometimes, the only thing we want is a good listener or a shoulder to lean on. Let her talk and be absorbed in what she's saying. Be involved.

Never lie: Being open and never lying establishes great verbal communication, which is at the heart of all great relationships.

Minimize jealousy: You may get a little jealous from time to time, and that's okay, as long as you try not to let it affect your relationship.

Best wishes to you both.

I am a 27 year-old man. My girlfriend had a serious relationship in the past. She hasn't spoken to him since 2018. However, she still keeps talking about him all the time. How do I make her stop talking about the other guy?

Name withheld

Are you sure your girlfriend is aware of the heartache she is causing you? Sometimes people do things unintentionally, unknowingly. Please stop fuming over this communication gap only in your heart and try telling her how you feel. Express. I am sure she will understand and you guys will be fine together. Just be open about your feelings and don't worry so much. Love is always meant to go a long way if it is true. Talk it out, sort it out and sail smoothly. Good luck!

By end 2020 I need to marry. I live in USA and have open relationships with 3 men. Truly confused on who is the right one to marry! Please guide.

Divya, USA

You will know you are marrying the right person when you feel support and encouragement about your own growth – both emotionally and intellectually. The right person will want you to be emotionally healthy and able to stand on your own feet. When you are with the right person you will feel good about yourself, safe and fulfilled. The right person is someone who is your friend. Your love and your marriage will slowly fade if the two of you are not friends. The right person will trust you and not spy on you. Feeling as if you have to justify your every move will become a very heavy burden. May you find the 'right' person soon. All the best dear.

I have been trying to overcome anxiety issues. I am in class 11 and facing difficulties. Kindly help.

Dilpreet, Noida

Here are some tips that might help you:

Reset your mind by focusing on another sensation, like the feel of the ground under your feet.

Ask yourself if your negative thoughts are rational enough. You will find the answer.

Breathe deeply, starting at the bottom of your stomach.

Find a quiet space and talk to yourself, using calming and encouraging words.

Encourage yourself to listen to music, read a book, take a stroll under the sky and feel better.

Send your questions to roopshashotm@gmail.com