Talking Shop: Cortile volatile

“The people who cast

the votes don't decide

an election, the people

who count the votes do.”

—Joseph Stalin

For those who think Joseph Stalin got it right, you haven’t heard what Otto von Bismarck had to say in a similar vein: “People never lie so much as after a hunt, during a war or before an election.” The last cog in the quote above is where India finds itself today, dead-centre in the midst of the biggest elections in the largest democracy in the world, in the most populous nation in this planet of 8 billion people. By the end of next month, 20 per cent of the globe will carry black Indian ink on their index fingers. More important is what they carry on their conscience a week from then on, when the next Government is sworn in to power—a sense of victory, a whiff of trepidation or a measure of guilt. Or none of the above, or nothing at all.

The last two options are the scariest and the reasons for this have already come into deadly play, with lies, half-truths and verbal mendacities becoming the name of the game. At the ground level, the raving, ranting and finger-pointing has (b)reached levels of cacophony unseen before. India’s roadsides, bylanes, aisles, alleys, courtyards and all other possible venues for gatherings are running amok and asunder, buzzing with either raucous crescendo or muted murmurs. After all, it is election time and everything is fair. Mind you, an indelible die is being cast, one that shall inexorably shape the immediate future of 142 crore Indians, give or take a few thousand special people. These are the kindred souls who make it to the podium and those who cheer(ed) them on.

What about the rest?

Not much to be done here for the rest, I would daresay. After all, it is only around 45 per cent of the country’s graduates who are jobless today. But do remember that nearly 82 crore people are being provided free foodgrain to keep home and hearth running, burning bright. Yes, the savings of the average Indian John and Jane are at a new low as expenditure outstrips earnings by more than a few times in over a billion cases. But do remember that India’s IITs, IIMs and thousands of other colleges are churning out specialist graduates ready to conquer the world. One can’t be pointing fingers just because the last few flights to chosen lands have well-nigh taken off or that overloaded ships have departed full-steam-ahead. Spoilsports you are.

Do not speak of the economy either with me, for I know best. India outstripped the United Kingdom recently in economic girth and the nation is on its way to becoming the third-largest economy in the world. What if our debt is at record highs and reaching levels that our GDP (Gross Domestic Product) may be hard-pressed to service? Do remember that our central debt was Rs 155.6 trillion, or 57 per cent of the GDP, in March 2023, while that of state governments was 28 per cent of the GDP.

Remember the Finance Ministry, which itself has stated that public debt-to-GDP has barely increased—sure, it went from 81 per cent in 2005-06 to 84 per cent in 2021-22, but was back to 81 per cent in 2022-23. Chew on that. And what if imports are growing at the cost of exports? It just proves that global manufacturers desperately need to cash in on the Indian dream. The fact that most Indians have stopped dreaming dreams of their own is a moot point.

What of other aspects?

There are no other aspects, period. Well, at least not any that deserve any merit or magnanimity of mention. So, what if some wrestlers were writhing on the Capital’s roads, demanding justice for the alleged non-aligned actions of a ‘gentleman’ of the sport? Do remember that as a nation, we have always been non-aligned to our very kernel. Thus, if our medal-winning, photo-worthy pugilists do not practice the sport in our glittering stadiums, we have to ensure that they do so elsewhere, be it writhing and sashaying in their swagger, yet remaining in tip(sy)-top shape.

Also, we have reached the moon with Chadrayaan, and new chapters of IIT and AIIMS are coming up all over the place. Latest figures report retail inflation is down, while industrial production is scaling pre-pandemic highs. So, what if the average Indian household has been forced to change its eating habits, unable to keep pace with the prices of raw materials needed to cook at home? Do remember that food delivery apps are growing at record levels, with pizzas and burgers fast replacing our aloo ka parantha, vada dosa and bisibelebath. Think of the boys and men who cavort our city streets now on their two-wheelers, rushing to our homes to deliver ready food.

Understand and forever remember that this is employment-generation orchestrated by tomorrow’s thinkers, today. The scale is mind-numbing, one that is enabling us to enjoy the privilege of having chhhole bhature delivered to us by those holding engineering and PhD degrees. Do spare a moment to applaud our swanky city roads and highways too, which are now seeing bike taxis taking over as jobless farmers switch gears, literally, to fend for and feed their own.

A small price to pay

The point has been proven, I am sure, that if you want progress as grandiose as enumerated above, you will encounter naysayers and doomsayers who ratchet up the ante and spread mischief. Many of today’s microphone-wielders talk of achievements that leave us scratching our heads, wondering where such creative lampoons are bred. But do appreciate the remarkable creativity and chutzpah in their claims. It is not for nothing that we are scaling new heights in literary fields as well, for no other land can boast of so masterfully usurping the four impudent intricacies of satire—raillery, sarcasm, innuendo and paradox. In the early 1600s, India was the first land to experience burlesque and stand-up comedians. Four centuries later, many of our chosen ones are giving those comics a run for their money. That alone should warm the cockles of our hearts.

In this march towards superlative progress, some shall be wounded. When you run into such people, remind them that most wounds heal with stitches and band-aid, some with time. They may agree, while reminding you that healing also requires time, help and hope. If that happens, ignore them. Since countless others have learnt to live with wounds, these people shall too. You can also visit George Elliot’s saying to understand what’s happening: “An election is coming and universal peace has been declared. Foxes have a sincere interest in prolonging the lives of the poultry.”

Soliloquy: Lambs face a similar fate as they find themselves being fattened, and the latest ‘Breaking News’ is that they have stopped bleating. While some dedicate this phenomenon to the practice of so many stalwarts now bleating into microphones, experts say the dumb lambs are fully focussed on darting their vision around, tremulously scouring all sides for the inevitable, descending guillotine.

The writer is a veteran journalist and communications specialist. He can be reached on narayanrajeev2006@gmail.com. Views expressed are personal