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Anchor your emotions

If you are always angry, it’s important to try and figure out the cause, so that it doesn’t remain a problem.

An unknown guy is texting me every day. He sends poems and romantic lines. I'm curious about him but not sure how to deal with this. Can you help?
Sriya, Kolkata
Just don't get into this trap of faceless infatuations. Most of the times, the reality is far away from expectation. Don't give into anyone based on such frivolous communication. Try to find out the identity of the sender and be very cautious. Life is not a fantasy trip but a realistic one.
I'm 43, I think I feel angry all the time. I'm losing friends and life is getting complicated. Can you help?
Dilip, New Delhi
Anger is something which everyone experiences. It can become hard to deal with when you can't shake off your anger and you're in a constant bad mood. If you are always angry, it's important to try and figure out the cause, so that it doesn't remain a problem. We're hardly ever 'just' angry – it's usually a reaction to feeling hurt, upset, disappointed, confused, afraid etc. Try and work out if any of these causes apply to your own anger – it may help to talk it through with a good friend or family member. Then you can work on strategies to solve the problem, or cope with what is happening.
If your anger is impacting your day to day life it could be really useful to talk to an expert, like a counsellor. They can help you process all your feelings about what's going on. Good luck and be happy, less angry!
Our only son is 26 and running his business. He has developed major drinking habits. He regularly comes home in an unstable condition. What should we do?
Mrs and Mr. Nagra, Noida
You should have a breakfast table chat with him. As parents, express your concern in a friendly manner. Try to understand his reasons for drinking so much. Don't get into an argumentative mood. Look and sound hurt but not nagging. Parents, their precious teardrops, sincere requests and endless love sometimes have huge healing effects on kids. You can also take some inputs from your doctor who can advise you ways to treat alcoholism. Seek professional help from rehabilitation centers, if needed. Good luck!
I want to leave my house but I don't know what to do. I'm in class 8. Please help me!
Name unknown, New Delhi
While reading your question, I was able to feel your desperation. You should make a copy of your question and take it to a counselor or someone you trust around you. You should not live under these conditions any longer. When you go to discuss this matter with anyone, be ready to present your case. Dress as nicely as possible, sit up straight, speak slowly and clearly, and try to let the person know how impossible your life has become. Don't get discouraged if you don't get help at the first place you go. Keep trying! Whatever you do, don't give up on life. Keep going to school and try to do your best. Education is usually the answer to a better life. You have my best wishes for a successful resolution of this difficult situation. Good luck.
(Send your questions to roopshashotm@gmail.com)
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